Without even pausing to think about what to do, AJ was flying through the balcony door and into the hotel room. He vaguely saw Nick running as well. Both were heading toward the same place. The bathroom. Brian was in the bathroom. AJ knew that scream; recognized who it belonged to. He also recognized the terror that was in it.

 

Without a qualm he ducked around Nick and darted into the bathroom doorway. Once there, he froze. Brian was standing in the middle of the bathroom, hands lifted and gripping in his hair, little gasping sounds falling from his lips. It was a heart wrenching sight. Shivers and shudders ran up and down that compact frame so strongly that AJ wondered how the hell Brian was still on his feet. All over the counter in front of him was what looked to be the contents of AJ’s toiletries bag.

 

Making a soft sound of distress in the back of his throat, Nick tried to step forward but was blocked when AJ threw a hand up. He opened his mouth to protest but changed his mind when he saw AJ’s face. He wasn’t even paying Nick any more attention.

 

AJ was busy surveying the area around Brian. Looking all over to try to figure out what might have set this off. His heart wanted to rush in and wrap Brian in a tight hug. His brain knew that right now he wouldn’t be welcome. He would be able to help better if he knew what he was up against. So he scanned the area, trying to see if there was something in here that had set him off.

 

Obviously it had something to do with whatever had been in that bag. But, what was it? A toothbrush and toothpaste wouldn’t set him off. There was dental floss, some store brand ibuprofen, a few razors…was it the razors? Had those set Brian to thinking about suicide?

 

That sent a chill down AJ’s spine. He took a small step into the room, hands held loosely on either side of him. No, there was no blood, none of the shaving razors were broken. None of the blades had been taken out. So, not suicide. Then, what? The only other thing on the counter was a box of condoms.

 

Condoms.

 

With one blinding flash, AJ knew what it was that had upset Brian. God, what an idiot he’d been for not thinking of this sooner. He’d worked so hard on not asking Brian any more than he wanted to give that he hadn’t even asked one of the most important questions. Had the man protected himself? Now he could see, the answer was obviously no.

 

Just as he was trying to figure out how to approach Brian, something seemed to click in the older man. Brian dropped his hands from his hair and, with a loud scream of pain and rage, swiped his hands over the counter, sending everything flying to the floor. He kicked at them, bringing one fist up like he was about to hit the wall.

 

That took the decision away from AJ. He shot forward, knowing that Brian was going to panic as soon as he did this and also knowing that he was most likely going to be sore as hell by the time this was done and over with. Even with that knowledge, AJ did the only thing he could. When he reached Brian he wrapped his arms around him, pinning Brian’s arms to his sides so he couldn’t damage either the bathroom or himself.

 

As AJ had known would happen, though, it instantly sent Brian’s panic into overdrive. The older man screamed again, bucking his whole body to try and break free, slamming his head straight back into AJ’s face.

 

He managed to move quick enough that Brian didn’t break his nose, but he did hit it enough to make it hurt like hell and to have it bleeding. AJ ignored it.

 

“Brian, sweetheart, it’s Alex. It’s me. I’ve got you. You need to calm down, ok? Come on, calm down for me.” AJ kept up his soothing litany, trying to break through Brian’s terror enough for him to hear AJ talking. He knew that once Brian heard his voice he would know it was safe. But he had to break past all that fear first. “Come on, Brian, come on. You’re not there. I’m not him. This is me, Alex. I’m right here with you. I’m just holding you so you don’t hurt yourself. I won’t hurt you, I promise that. I won’t hurt you.”

 

“No!” Brian shrieked. He threw his body again, thrashing around to try and break free. “No, not again! No! No!” He kicked his feet back, aiming for anything he could reach.

 

Grunting against the assault on his shins, AJ flipped Brian around, still keeping him in the ring of his arms. But this brought their faces close together. “Brian!” He snapped, forcing his voice to be sharp and hard. It actually cut through Brian’s scream for a minute, stopping his fists in mid hit against AJ’s chest.

 

Recognition lit Brian’s face. Then everything crumbled underneath fear and heartbreak. “Let go of me.” Brian said hoarsely. “Don’t touch me. You can’t touch me.”

 

“I am touching you.” AJ pulled Brian’s stiff body closer, melding them together as best as he could. He ignored the tension that still gripped Brian, making his muscles unyielding. “I’m touching you and nothing’s happening.” He dipped his head down, letting the sides of their heads press together so that they were staring over one another’s shoulders. Brian’s hands had dropped limply to his sides by now.

 

A small shudder ran down Brian. “I’m not…he didn’t…I mean.” The words didn’t seem to want to come, but AJ understood.

 

He forgot totally about Nick still standing in the doorway. The both of them did. Feeling his heart throb at the disgust and agony that marred Brian’s voice, AJ sought only to soothe. “Brian, do you think I’m dirty?” he asked him gently. “Do you think I shouldn’t touch anyone?”

 

“No.” Brian whispered quickly. “But, it’s not the same…”

 

“Yes, it is. You just haven’t thought about that part of things yet. I had the same fear, Bri. I did. I couldn’t even remember the incidents half the time. How would I have known if I was protected?” For Brian, only for him, AJ dredged into the deepest part of his heart yet again, exposing his own fears and his own pain in the hope that he’d ease some of Brian’s pain. He didn’t think about his young friend who was silently listening to this all with tears standing in his eyes. “I have no idea how many people, men or women, that I slept with and if I was protected with any of them. When you’re drunk or high you don’t think of that shit. Hell, Bri, you know that I can’t even remember doing it half the time I was so loaded. Protected? I doubt I ever was.”

 

“You understand then.” A soft hiccup over AJ’s shoulder. “Let go of me. Until I know, I can’t… if I am, if I have…” He obviously had a hard time putting his fears into words; every time he tried he started to stutter.

 

AJ rubbed his hands over Brian’s back. “We’ll take you in, we’ll get you tested. That’s all it takes. A test now, a test in a few months, then a test at six months from now and at a year. I’ve done it. I’m due for another here before too long. I’ll go with you if you want. But it’s ok. This is not your fault.” He wanted to make that clear. “No matter what, don’t start feeling guilty. Don’t blame yourself.”

 

Another shudder ripped through Brian. “I can’t take it. I hate this, Alex. I hate this. I feel just…I feel dirty. I feel…” A sob cut off what he’d been saying.

 

Instead of trying to stop the tears, AJ rubbed his back more and murmured soothingly to him. “You will do this. You’re so strong, Bri. You’re not alone, either. I’m here. I won’t leave you alone because of this. You’re not dirty, sweetheart. Neither of us are.”

 

“But what if, I mean, what if he gave, what if I have…”

 

“Then we’ll deal with it when it comes.” AJ told him practically. He pulled back enough to look in Brian’s face. Now that he knew there was no immediate danger, AJ relaxed his grip, letting his hands slide to rest lightly on Brian’s arms. “You are not alone in this, you hear me? You are not alone.”

 

That snapped the last thread of Brian’s control. He dissolved in tears and did the one thing that took more energy than anything else. He let himself collapse into AJ’s arms as he sobbed his heart out.

 

~~~~~~~~~~

 

Wiping tears from his cheeks, Nick backed slowly out of the bathroom. His heart throbbed with each step he took away from that bathroom. He knew that, right now, the thing those two would need most was privacy. So he was giving it to them by leaving the hotel room. But the sounds of Brian’s sobs followed Nick out to the hallway, filling his ears and making him want to cry.

 

God, Brian sounded so hurt! So…broken. He’d been acting strong for a while there and that was something that Nick had expected. That was just the kind of guy Brian was. He had such an inner strength. Underneath all that goofiness there was a will like iron.

 

A hand gently touched Nick’s shoulder, one he recognized and trusted. Because of that he allowed that hand to steer him into another room. Then, to turn him and take him into a warm embrace. Nick let himself lean against Kevin, knowing that here he was safe to break for a few minutes.

 

After a few minutes Nick managed to bring himself back under control enough that he could step back from Kevin. He raised a hand to wipe at his face but Kevin caught it, shaking his head. He held a tissue out to Nick. “You always try to use your sleeve or something like that.” Kevin said fondly.

 

Nick took the tissue and wiped his cheeks off before blowing his nose. “Thanks.”

 

“Want to talk about it?”

 

Instinctively, Nick started to say no. He had opened his mouth with every intention of turning Kevin down. So it was a surprise even to him when he said “I hate watching this, Kev.”

 

Kevin leaned against the wall, controlling the urge to go and soothe his friend. “You mean all of this with Brian?” He asked quietly.

 

“He was doing so well! I went to visit and he was joking with me and eating and he even reached out and touched me. I mean, it was great Kev.” Nick wrapped his arms around his waist, the tissue now clenched in his fist, forgotten. “He went to go take a shower and Age and I were talking. I was a little worried cause when Bri touched me, J didn’t look real happy. But we got things all squared away, all that jazz. I stepped back in the room. Then I heard Brian scream.”

 

Nick shuddered slightly. He could still hear Brian’s scream echoing in his ears. “J beat me in there. Wouldn’t let me go to Bri.” Closing his eyes he saw Brian all over again, trembling in the middle of that bathroom, making those pitiful little sounds. “He freaked out and started knocking shit off the counter, screaming. J shot out and grabbed him. Fuck, Kev, he got knocked in the face, he’ll be lucky if his nose isn’t broken.”

 

That had Kevin standing up straight again. “Brian broke AJ’s nose?” He asked in surprise.

 

“Well, Bri threw his head back and knocked AJ in the face. He was bleeding and shit. But that, that I could deal with. It was, God I wish you could have seen it. Bri thought he was being attacked again.”

 

“I can only imagine. Poor Brian.” Kevin’s heartbreak was evident in his voice.

 

“I didn’t understand a lot of what they were saying at first. Bri was like, half saying his sentences but I guess J understood. After a bit I figured out what they were talking about. He…he realized he the guy hadn’t, well, that he hadn’t used protection.” Stumbling over the last part, Nick finally managed to spit it out.

 

He watched as recognition dawned on Kevin’s face, followed closely by horror. “Oh my God.”

 

“Age told him that he’ll take him in for the tests and shit. That he won’t let him be alone.”

 

“Good.” That seemed to ease Kevin just a little. “AJ will take care of him.”

 

That had Nick looking over at Kevin. He remembered what AJ had said to Brian, what he had realized about AJ that he hadn’t known before. Did…did Kevin know about that too? That thought bothered Nick. Did everybody but him get to know about things? Had they all known about this side of AJ’s life and had kept it from him? “You knew, didn’t you?” Nick asked in with annoyance.

 

Kevin looked at him curiously. “Knew? Knew what, Nick?”

 

“You’re not fooling me. You knew about Age, didn’t you? God, did everyone but me know? I mean, I knew he slept with people when he was high and shit, but I didn’t know it was like that!”

 

Hands gripped Nick’s arms, turning him so that he was facing a very annoyed looking Kevin. “What the hell are you talking about, Nick?” The older man demanded. He looked honestly confused. Realization sank in for Nick. Kevin hadn’t known.  God. AJ was going to kill him now. He was going to fucking flip if he found out Nick was telling his secrets.

 

It was too late to take it all back, though. He couldn’t cover it up, not against Kevin. He was stuck finishing it. “Age was telling Brian he understood. That he knew what it was to be afraid of having contracted something. He said something about not knowing how many women and men he slept with and how he was drunk or high or whatever most the time. He said he doesn’t even remember having sex half the time, he was so loaded.”

 

For a moment Kevin stared at him, his hands tight on Nick’s arms. Just when Nick was ready to speak up, to ask Kevin to let go of him before he bruised him, Kevin let go to spin and slam his fist into the wall. “How many?” he swore heatedly. “How many times am I going to fail everyone? I was there for Brian before when I should have been. It took me forever to notice AJ’s addiction and apparently I never even noticed that he was whoring himself the whole time, or that he had all these fears of being infected with something.”

 

The self-hatred in Kevin had Nick reaching a hand out, wanting to be the one to soothe now.  But Kevin stepped back from him. “No.” He said, his voice firm. “I’ve fucked up before. I’m not fucking up again.” Turning, Kevin walked over to the hotel room’s phone.

 

“What’re you doing?” Nick asked him.

 

“I’m doing what I need to. I’m helping my friends.” Dialing a few numbers, Kevin held the phone to his ear and looked at Nick. “I’m canceling the show tonight.”

 

Nick looked at him and nodded. He was right. It was the right choice.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

That night someone else received the same news but their reaction was quite different. He stood outside the arena, waiting in line to go inside, when the announcement came over the speakers. Due to illness, the Backstreet Boys would not be performing this night. Not performing? Not performing? How dare they! Fury had the man shaking, his hands clenched in fists on either side of him.

 

Laughter echoed mockingly in his mind. “Your precious little singer bailed on you.” Whispered a haunting voice. The man rolled his neck, trying to block that voice out. He didn’t want to hear it. “Yeah, ignore me. See how long it last. It serves you right! He’ll never want you.”

 

“Shut up!” The man whispered furiously. He ignored the looks he received. None of them knew the truth. None of them understood.

 

How dare Brian not come here tonight? How dare he cancel a show when he was supposed to be here, performing! Tonight he had planned on making contact with Brian. Leaving him a little gift in his changing room. But now he wasn’t here. Furious, the man glared up at the sign above the arena that showed the word “Cancelled.”

 

A voice cut through his silent ranting, drawing his attention back to the world. Could it be? Was it really…Brian?

 

He looked to the side and saw a mop of blond curls. Slightly taller than Brian, yes, and not as muscled. But he had the hair and the eyes. Even the twang. The man found himself moving, following this guy as he walked away from the arena, following him down the road. He followed his Brian lookalike until he was wandering alone down a street, until he couldn’t handle it anymore.

 

There was no one in sight as he caught up to him. “Hey!” he called out.

 

The guy turned a little, looking over his shoulder. “Um, hi.” His voice was hesitant, shy, with that warm country sound to it. Warmth filled the man. This wasn’t Brian, but he was so close, so perfect.

 

“Hey. I saw you back there at the concert. I was there too.” He flashed a smile before sticking out a hand. “I’m Zach.”

 

The guy looked down at Zach’s hand then back up at his face. “Nice to meet you, but I’m on my way home right now, so if you’ll excuse me…”

 

“Well now,” Zach jogged forward to keep up with him. “No need to be rude. I was just being friendly.”

 

The man ignored him, walking along and staring straight ahead. In Zach’s mind he heard that same voice again, laughing at him, taunting him. “He doesn’t want you. Just like the rest of us, he knows what you are. A freak. A murderer!”

 

“Go away.” He mumbled.

 

Another voice, another lover, pulsed at Zach’s temples. “You killed us, Zach. We’re not going away that easy. We want to watch you fail. Watch you fall. You’ll never have your little lover boy.”

 

“I will!” Zach shouted out, startling the man he was following. With a roar of rage, Zach grabbed the strangers arm and flung him down the alley at their side. The man screamed, his eyes going wide as he hit the pavement.

 

Zach advanced on him, fury rippling down his muscles. In his insanity he saw Brian lying on the pavement below him. His angel. “Why’d you cancel the show, Brian?” He demanded. One hand snaked out, grabbing a fistful of ‘Brian’s’ shirt and yanking him to his feet. “I was coming to see you! I had a present and everything for you!”

 

“I’m not him!” The man exclaimed. He sobbed when Zach punched him in the gut, almost knocking him to the ground again. “I’m not Brian!” He wheezed out. “Please, I was just there for the show! I’m not him!”

 

Zach punched him again, this time letting him drop to the ground. “Lies!” he shrieked. Dropping down, he grabbed the guys shirt and lifted him, slamming his head back into the pavement. “I love you! We’re meant to be together, don’t you know that? I would’ve given you everything!” He screamed.

 

The man begged underneath him, begging for his life, knowing that insanity lurked in this man’s eyes.

 

The voices in Zach’s head were taunting him, torturing him. He would make them go away. He would do it! He’d show them and he’d show Brian that he wasn’t someone to be fucked with. He’d make it all go away. He’d make it stop. He had to stop the screaming. They were screaming in his mind, the guy was screaming below him. He had to make the screaming stop!

 

A knife was in his hand, he didn’t remember pulling it from his pocket, and then he was slamming it into the body underneath him. Over and over and over he stabbed. He had to stop the screaming! He had to!

 

Finally, thank God, the screams finally stopped. Zach looked down at the body underneath him with disgust. He could see now that this wasn’t Brian. No, this wans’t his Brian. It was just another pathetic substitute.

 

He rose to his feet, the body already forgotten. He’d find his Brian. There’d be another show, another night. He’d find him and then, oh yes, then they would see.

 

Without a hesitation in his step, Zach walked away from the mutilated body, blood soaking his whole front, not knowing or caring that the body would be found an hour later. Not caring about the family that would be crying this night at the loss of their son whose only fault had been his resemblance to a blond pop star.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Morning rolled around, its bright light filling up the hotel room. AJ stood on the balcony, watching it as it came up, his mind drifting far away. It had been a long night, one of the longest he could remember since his own dark days. When Kevin had text to say that he’d got a general idea of what had happened and had canceled the show, AJ had only been grateful.

 

After his crying jag in the bathroom, Brian had been so drained that he’d barely managed to walk to the bed. But AJ had got him there, tucked him in, then held his hand as he drifted off to sleep. Only once he was sure that Brian was out did AJ move.

 

He’d gone to the bathroom and washed all the blood off his face. Then he’d pulled his clothes off, tossed them in the garbage before finding some clean ones. When he’d looked in the mirror again he’d swore lightly. His nose was bruised and was pretty tender, but nothing he couldn’t live with. At least it was broken, or extremely swollen. Makeup should be able to cover it up pretty well.

 

Little bruises peppered his shins from where Brian’s feet had connected, but he knew he could hide those. And hide them he would. There was absolutely no reason that Brian needed to see them. That would only serve to make him feel guilty, which was the very last thing that Brian needed to be feeling.

 

About that moment had been when the first nightmare had hit Brian. He’d thrashed and groaned and screamed in his sleep so that AJ had rushed out there, quickly petting and soothing him back to sleep.

 

So it had gone all night long. AJ hadn’t slept but for little spurts here and there, sitting up alongside the bed. Somewhere around five a.m. Brian had finally dropped off to a deep sleep. But AJ had found himself unable to sleep, so he’d headed out to the balcony to smoke and pace and think.

 

A soft knock at the door startled AJ back to the present moment. He put his cigarette out in the ashtray before quickly heading to answer the door. A look at the bed showed that the knocking hadn’t disturbed Brian at all, thank God.

 

When AJ opened the door and found Kevin on the other side it kind of surprised him. It was just past sunrise. What was Kevin doing up already? “Morning, Kev. What can I do for you?” He asked politely.

 

Kevin smiled fondly at him, one hand coming up to hover near AJ’s cheek before dropping away. “Your nose looks like shit, short stack. Always knew cos had a hard head.”

 

Ah, so that explained it. Nick had gone and talked to Kevin. That didn’t surprise AJ too much. He’d kind of figured that Nick would. It was best, really, that Kevin be kept up on how his cousin was doing and AJ just couldn’t go and tell him, not if he expected to keep Brian’s trust. So it was nice to have a middle man who understood all that and took care of it. God bless Nick sometimes.

 

“Yeah. I usually dodge better, but he was quick.” AJ shot back, smirking.

 

Hooking his hands in his pockets, Kevin looked AJ over from head to toe, his gaze searching, almost as if he could see right through him. It took everything AJ had not to squirm underneath that intense stare. Kevin had always had that effect on him. Like he was being x-rayed.

 

“I’m glad you’re the one that answered the door. I figured it might be you.” Kevin said suddenly. He looked around the hall, which was empty at this early hour. AJ made to gesture to let him in but Kevin shook his head. “No, I bet he’s asleep. I heard him every now and again last night. If he’s finally asleep then we’ll just let him be. No one’s gonna hear us out here. They’re all asleep too.”

 

“Normal people would be right now.”

 

That earned AJ a smile. “True, J. But who ever said any of us were normal?” He flashed that grin that rarely anyone ever saw. It did wonders to his looks; softening his face and brightening his eyes. AJ had always thought that Kevin should smile more, he was a more approachable, attractive man when he did. “But, anyways, I wanted to say a few things to you, Age. Primarily, thanks for taking such good care of him. You’re just what he needs and I know he’s in good hands here.”

 

Surprise had AJ raising his eyebrows. He’d never imagined hearing Kevin say these kinds of things to him. Hell, he’d always been considered the fuck up, the rebel, the scatterbrained one. If someone was going to be late, it was going to be AJ. Lost? AJ. Forget where they were or where they were going next? AJ. That was just…well, that was just how it was!

 

Seeing the surprise on AJ’s face, Kevin chuckled. “You’ve matured a lot, short stack. Didn’t you think that we all saw it? That we noticed? You’ve become a hell of a guy. I’m proud of you.”

 

Now that really had AJ speechless. Never, ever, had he expected to hear those words come from Kevin’s mouth and be directed at him. Flustered, he dropped his gaze. “I just…” he paused, clearing his throat, trying to talk around the lump that had formed there. “I’m just doing what needs doing. I care for him. I can’t not help him.”

 

“That right there says how much you’ve grown up.” Kevin smiled in a kind way. Then his look changed, turning slightly sadder. “I just wish one of us could have been there for you the way you are for him.”

 

With his usual attitude for things, AJ shrugged that off. “I’m a kind of ‘on my own’ guy. Bri, not so much. He craves people, contact, all that shit. Close family, friends, all that. I like people, sure, but more like the being on stage kind. I like to have people watch me sing. I like being the center of attention when I perform, and with y’all sometimes too. But personally? My private shit? No, I’m the loner kind of guy there.”

 

Just as Kevin opened his mouth to ask how Brian was doing, the very person came walking up to the door, a cell phone in hand. AJ instantly turned to him, not saying a word, knowing that it was all in his eyes anyways. The smile Brian gave him was more relaxing than anything else. In that smile he could see that Brian had found that solid ground beneath him again. That inner strength that he had that had carried him through so much.

 

“Phone rang, woke me up.” Brian said softly. He held it out to AJ. “It’s Nick. Says he needs to talk to you, now.”

 

Confused, AJ took the phone, signaling to Kevin before walking away. “Yeah, Carter?”

 

“Shit’s bad, J. Really fucking bad.”

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Brian wrapped his arms around his waist as he watched AJ walk toward the balcony. He shuddered a little, thinking of AJ being out there, so high up. It wasn’t bad enough that he was scared of heights, but he absolutely hated it when the others went out on them. If one stayed out for too long and Brian was watching, he’d find himself getting nauseous.

 

To prevent that from happening, he turned away just as AJ was lighting his cigarette. Nerves tingled under his skin, a byproduct of a shitty night, but he pushed them down and looked over to his cousin. “Morning, Kev.”

 

He still felt guilty for the way he’d cringed away from Kevin before. Now there was embarrassment and shame added on top of it, knowing that Kevin knew what was going on. But just because Kevin knew didn’t mean that Brian had to admit that he knew that Kevin knew.

 

That thought made him pause. Hell, even to him that sounded crazy.

 

Clueless to Brian’s internal debate, Kevin smiled. “Morning, cos. I was awake, drinking coffee on my balcony and I smelled AJ smoking so I popped over to talk to him for a bit.”

 

“And check on me.” Brian said impishly. He couldn’t resist. Though the night had been a rough one, extremely rough, he woke up feeling better. Not perfect, no, but better. This was just another setback. A big one, yes, but he could get past it. AJ’s practicality had helped. He’d been so blunt about it that there really left no room for the fears. Go in, get tested. Get tested again in a few months, again at six, and one last time at a year. If there was something, then treat it. He’d said it all so matter of fact that Brian found himself thinking of it that way to. If AJ had done this, and done it on his own, then Brian could do it too.

 

Silence stretched awkwardly between the cousins for a moment. Neither really knew how to act with the other.

 

A loud “What?” caught both their attention. Brian turned to look toward the balcony where AJ was still standing. He had one hand holding the phone, the other holding his cigarette right in front of him as if he had been about to take a drag and had suddenly forgotten about it. Watching, Brian saw that hand drop down, visibly shaking. Something was gone on. Something serious, if it had AJ reacting that way. There was tension in his whole body.

 

Fear coiled in Brian’s stomach. “I’ll catch you later, Kev.” He murmured before absentmindedly shutting the door. His whole attention was focused on AJ now. What was going on? He couldn’t shake the feeling of dread that was starting. This had something to do with him, he was sure of it. But what the hell was it? Did he even want to know?

 

Brian stood in the middle of the room as he watched AJ close the cell phone. For a moment the young man stared down at the phone in his hand as if unsure what to do with it. His shoulders were slumped.

 

What was it that had AJ that defeated looking? Whatever it was couldn’t be good. God, what was it? Brian felt his hands start to tremble a little. This was going to be bad. So, so bad.

 

When AJ turned around and saw Brian there, he didn’t startle. Just stared for a moment before sighing. Then he was moving toward the door, into the room. After he shut the balcony door behind him he just stood there for a minute, staring.

 

Brian found himself speaking, though he hadn’t intended on it. “This has something to do with… with him, doesn’t it?”

 

“Yes.” AJ answered, his voice raspy.

 

Another tremble ran through Brian’s hands. “He’s coming for me, isn’t he? He said he’d be back.”

 

AJ didn’t look away from Brian’s eyes. Their gazes seemed glued to one another. “Yes.”

 

Surprisingly, the news didn’t send Brian into an instant panic. Instead it felt as if numbness was spreading through him. He had known this was coming. Known it would happen. Not exactly what, but he had known that something was coming. “What happened?”

 

Their eyes still locked, AJ stepped closer. He hesitated only for a second before firming his spine. Brian could see AJ debate what to say and he could tell that AJ had decided to give it all to him straight. He appreciated that. This could be dealt with if he had the facts. He couldn’t handle it right if there was lies mixed in.

 

“Nick put in some feelers with some cop friends he says you two have. Just to be cautious.” AJ stepped closer as he spoke until they were barely a half foot apart. But he didn’t reach out to touch Brian, leaving that up to him. Again, Brian appreciated him for it. But he needed that contact right then. Needed it desperately. Whatever was coming wasn’t going to be pleasant. He knew it, deep down.

 

Their fingers laced together, Brian watched AJ swallow before he continued. “Something… something happened last night. A man was, was murdered.” AJ had to pause to swallow again. “He had blond curly hair, was a southern boy. Just a bit taller than you. He was supposed to have been at our show last night.”

 

Brian felt the world sway around him. “oh.” He whispered quietly. The world seemed to spin for a moment before swallowing him. The last thing he saw as he went down was AJ darting forward to catch him, cursing. Then there was only darkness.