Those eyes, so dark with insanity, windows to the twisted soul underneath “What’re you doing?” He swore at AJ. A foot came flying out at him. AJ barely had enough time to bring his hands up over his face before he was caught in the side of his head with Zach’s boot. Stars exploded in his vision. His already injured head screamed at him in protest.
Dazed, AJ fought against the waves of blackness that tried to take him under. He felt something grab his arm and tried to fight against it, but he was weak as a kitten. His sleeve was shoved up in no time at all. Just as AJ felt his vision clear a little, there came the unmistakable feel of a needle sliding into his skin. His first instinct was to buck and fight, but reason prevailed. If he did, the needle could break in his skin or pierce through and cause damage.
As quickly as it went in it was being drawn back out. AJ felt the effects almost instantly. His body felt heavier; his limbs didn’t want to move.
No, God, make it stop. No, no!
Suddenly hands were on him; gentle hands that were trying to soothe as they moved over him. He heard Brian’s voice again, slightly distant. “What did you do to him? You said you wouldn’t hurt him! That was the deal!”
Sweet Brian. Sweet, kind, loving Brian, so broken on the inside and yet still so full of love. Only Brian would think to make a deal with someone as insane as Zach just to protect the person they loved .Why, Brian? Why would you do it? The thought plagued AJ. It tormented him the same as the memories were doing. He was trapped here, relieving it all, stuck in a daze. Was this his hell? Was this his punishment for not saving Brian? Had he died and was now sentenced to an eternity of this pain?
Then Brian was there, right by his face, kissing his cheek. “Be strong, Alex. Help is coming. Be strong, please. I love you. More than anything, I love you.” Brian whispered almost silently in his ear. One last touch and then it was gone.
No, don’t leave! Don’t go with him! Everything in AJ wanted to scream that. Don’t go! He felt something touching him, something that didn’t feel a part of the dream, but he couldn’t focus on it. His mind kept playing that image over and over of Brian and Zach, walking off together into the darkness. Every detail was burned into his mind with stunning clarity. No!
“Stop, just stop! Can’t you see you’re making it worse?”
What was that? That wasn’t part of his memory. Was it? He didn’t recall that. That hadn’t happened. But who was that? Who was here with him in his hell? That almost sounded like….Howie. But why would Howie be here?
“I said don’t touch him!”
Clearer that time. That was definitely Howie. A little of the fog on AJ’s brain lifted. Ok, so maybe he wasn’t in hell. But if he wasn’t in hell, where on earth was he?
More of the fog was lifting, making his thoughts clearer and clearer. There was some strange beeping sound nearby. Other voices were coming out now too. Was that Nick’s voice? And…Kevin? But that meant that he was alive. The last memory he had, though, was lying on the ground, watching Brian and Zach walk away from him….
Brian.
If there was anything that could clear his mind, thoughts of Brian would do it. AJ felt the last of the fog disappear from his brain. It was all suddenly clear. He had to be in a hospital. This meant that help had found him in enough time to save him from whatever Zach had injected into his body. If the guys were here with him maybe that meant that Brian had been found too!
AJ forced his eyes to open, though they ached to close again when light blinded him. He had to blink furiously to help them adjust. When they did, he saw three faces looming in front of him.
“You’re finally awake!” Nick exclaimed cheerfully. The sound seemed to echo around inside of AJ’s head with all the force of a boulder. He fought it as another wave of disorientation tried to come over him. That fog wanted to come back, trying to blanket his mind. No! Brian, Brian, Brian. He said that name like a mantra in his mind. It helped chase away the fog again; helped pull him even further back to reality.
Though it took more energy than he had thought it would, AJ forced himself to say the one thing that mattered the most to him. To speak his mantra out loud instead of just in his mind. “Brian.”
Howie’s hand was there, that touch so familiar, brushing against AJ’s arm. “Honey, take it easy. You were in quite an ordeal. You’ve been out of it for a few days.”
A few days? What? Holy shit. “Days?” He croaked out. God, but his throat felt dry! He ran his tongue around his mouth, trying to work up moisture, swallowing it down before he spoke again. “How long?”
“This is day four since they found you, AJ.” Kevin said softly.
Four days? Jesus. That was almost enough to distract AJ’s brain. But, as he shifted his body, pain echoed through him, pulling him from his thoughts for a bit. That momentary clarity brought on by the pain was enough to clear out AJ’s head and leave room for other thoughts. Room for him to remember that they hadn’t answered him about Brian yet. Granted, he hadn’t actually asked a question, but they had neatly avoided talking about Brian. That could mean only one thing. Something was wrong.
Despite the aches and pains, AJ put his hands on the bed and scooted his body up a little bit. When hands reached for him, he waved them away. “Where is Brian?” He asked them. The rasp that was always in his voice was stronger than normal, making his voice sound hard and harsh. It was an odd contrast to the trembles that were running through his limbs. He felt the familiar tug of detox; withdrawals and cravings battling inside of him. For once, it didn’t matter. In the face of his greatest fear, none of it mattered.
Three faces looked down, eyes refusing to meet his. In that instant, AJ had his answer. “You haven’t found him.” He wouldn’t think about the other option; refused to think that Brian might be dead. That thought was shoved ruthlessly down. Brian was not dead. He would know. In his heart, he would know. Part of him would be missing. Brian was not dead. He was alive.
“Not…not yet.” Kevin said. His voice trembled a little with the words.
AJ recognized that Kevin was upset. Who could blame him? This was his cousin they were talking about here! But he couldn’t find it in him to care. He’d been out for four fucking days and they hadn’t found Brian yet! Jesus fucking Christ!
The instant he thought that, AJ mentally stopped himself, thinking absently that Brian would slap him if he heard him say something that blasphemous. Oh, God, if only Brian was here to give him a head slap for that. It would mean that Brian was ok.
Vaguely he realized that the others were talking again. He caught the tail end of something that Kevin was saying. “…many times do I have to say I’m sorry?” The older man hissed.
“Howie, Kev, not right now.” Nick, surprisingly, was stepping in as the peacemaker. Nick, of all people! “Later, ok? Come on guys. Later.”
There was something going on here. But was it important? If it didn’t deal with Brian, what did it matter? He was the most important thing right now! “Are you guys going to tell me what the hell is going on?” AJ snapped at them, effectively cutting off their conversation.
His question had been meant to demand what was going on with Brian, but they took it as meaning that he wanted to know what they were talking about. Flushing, Kevin looked at the ground. Howie glared. But it was Nick who answered. “This doesn’t matter right now.” He told AJ, his eyes traveling to the two others. “It doesn’t matter how we got here. What matters is what we do now. What matters is finding Brian.”
AJ stared at them all in confusion. Slowly his brain seemed to piece together what little he’d heard with what Nick had just said. “What do you mean, how we got here?” He asked Nick. Furious, his eyes turned to the others. “What the hell does he mean?” Though it hurt, AJ pushed his back off the raised bed, leaning toward them. His hands curled into fists in the blankets. This had something to do with Brian. Everything that dealt with Brian was important. He needed to know! Four days his mind kept repeating. So much could have happened in four days.
“Well…” Kevin shuffled a little, avoiding looking at AJ. “Now, keep your cool, J. Please. I didn’t mean any harm, I really didn’t. I mean, you know how Brian gets. You can’t stop him when he has his mind set on something. And really, I figured he’s a grown man; he can make his own decisions, right? Not that it makes it ok.” Kevin’s words poured from him, one tripping over the next as they rushed to get past his lips. “I know I’m to blame and I hope you’ll forgive me, I just did what he wanted. I mean, he’s so stubborn he would have found a way to do it anyways…”
A general idea was becoming clear even through the jumbled chaos of what Kevin was saying. As it became clearer, AJ felt his anger start to build. He held one hand up. Silence filled the room.
Holding on to his anger by a single thread, AJ stared at Kevin’s bowed head. “Did you know about Brian’s little self-sacrificing plan? Is that what you’re telling me?”
“Yes.” Kevin whispered.
“And you told no one about it?”
“No.”
“You knew he was going to go and trade himself to Zach to save us? To save me?”
“Yes.”
For a tense moment there was silence. Then, “You son of a bitch.”
If Howie and Nick hadn’t been fast enough, AJ would have completed his leap from the bed. As it was, they barely caught him. He didn’t feel the aches in his body, didn’t care about the IV hooked to his hand that was now tugging as he struggled against the hands holding him to the bed. All he cared about was venting every ounce of pain in him against Kevin.
“I’m sorry, Age.” Kevin said. He looked so guilty and so upset that, in less dire circumstances, AJ might have relented. But not now. Not with this. All he could see was a haze of red. This person in front of him was the reason Brian had been able to do this. Another part of AJ’s mind argued with him, saying that he had noticed something was wrong and hadn’t pressed it. He was just as guilty. That guilt only fueled his anger.
He shoved against Nick and Howie’s restraining hands. “You’re sorry?” He hissed at him. “You’re fucking sorry? Like that makes it ok? He’s in the hands of the one motherfucker who has taken his heart, mind and soul and fucked him over. He’s been with Zach, a man who has no qualms about killing anyone that ruins this fantasy he’s built, for four fucking days! Do you realize what he’s living with right now?”
“I…”
“This man has killed people! He fucking ran Nick off the road and cut his brakes! He bashed me on the head, kicked the shit out of me, tied me up, and drugged me! The whole time, do you know what he was doing? Talking. Not to me. To people who weren’t there. Arguing with them about Brian. He would’ve killed Brian because he thought that Bri brought me with him when he was supposed to come alone. If Brian pisses him off, he won’t hesitate to kill him. And you let him go with him?” The last words ripped out of AJ like a scream.
Nick pushed hard against AJ, trying his best to keep him in the bed. “He’s alive, AJ.” He told him quickly. “We know he’s alive. Zach hasn’t killed him.”
“That’s right.” Howie chimed in. He, too, pushed harder into AJ, almost laying half on top of him to keep him pinned down. “He called Kev’s cell.”
That put a momentary end to AJ’s struggles. He went completely still. His eyes locked on Howie, the one person in the room he trusted more than anyone else. “He called?”
Now that AJ wasn’t struggling, Howie relaxed his grip, though he didn’t completely let go. “He did. He said to tell you not to forget what he said and that he meant every word. He said other stuff, about how he wanted to be there and all that kind of stuff, how Zach loves him, but we think he was just saying it as part of the game to stay safe.”
“No shit? Duh.” AJ rolled his eyes. This gave his heart new hope, though. If Brian was well enough to make phone calls, he couldn’t be too badly injured. Zach must trust him a little if he was allowing Brian to call out. AJ’s mind drifted back, sifting through the grainy memories from that night. “He’s going to play it safe till we rescue him.” AJ said softly, closing his eyes. Again, he saw the dark forest, little flashes of Brian by him. It was all so blurry and jumbled. “He…Bri was talking about having a house here, in Lexington. Close to his parents. I think Zach was agreeing with him.”
Frustrated, AJ brought his hands up, covering his face. He tried to force his memories to become clearer. It felt like there was something important he was missing! “I remember he called 9-1-1. I couldn’t really tell what he was saying, though. Dammit!” AJ thumped his hands against his forehead. “It’s so fucking jumbled up.”
Howie’s hand was suddenly there, smoothing across his hair. “Honey, you were drugged pretty hard.” He said. “No one expects you to remember anything. You’ve already told us more than we knew before. That’s a good thing. It’s helpful.”
“Yeah, Age. We’ll let Micheal and the others know, don’t worry. They’ll make sure to start looking around the Littrell’s house.” Nick added.
AJ moved his hands from his eyes. “I’m coming with you.”
“No!” Three voices said at the same time. It was Howie who continued, adding “You need to stay here. You’ve been sick and hurt, Alex. You need to stay in the hospital. Leave this to the police, ok? Let them do their job.”
One look at Howie’s face showed that his friend was firm in this. Instantly, AJ reworked his strategy. There was no way they were going to just let him walk out of here, not while they were on guard. So, he had to get them out of here.
It wasn’t hard to let his eyes slide closed or to let his body sag a little with exhaustion. Immediately they were all rushing to tell him that he should sleep some. Inside, AJ smirked. On the outside, he pretended to battle a yawn. “I’m fine. I want to help.” He protested.
“No, no, Age, you just sleep. We’ll come tell you the instant we know anything.” Nick was reassuring him. Howie kissed his forehead and smiled down at him. “You just rest, honey. I promise I will personally come tell you anything I find out, ok?”
“I…” He paused, yawned. “I’m not that sleepy…” Then, shameless, AJ pretended to drift off to sleep. Through his lashes he watched as his three friends crept silently from the room, shutting the door gently behind them. Then, because he knew Howie knew him well, AJ waited a few minutes more until he was convinced that even Howie was gone.
Once he was sure, AJ opened his eyes and sat up in bed. He looked around the room. First and foremost he needed clothes. Usually in these places they kept your clothes in a bag in the bathroom. At least, they had the few times he’d had to overnight it at a hospital. So AJ grit his teeth and climbed out of his hospital bed on legs that were shakier than he wanted to admit to. He started to walk, only to feel a tug at his hand.
It took him a moment to realize that the IV was still in. AJ thought about it for a moment before shrugging. Only one thing to do. He pulled the tape off first, then pulled his IV out. He did the same to the one in the bend of his elbow as well. That one started to bleed slightly, so he pressed his thumb over it as he headed to the bathroom.
Right there on the shelf sat a bag. Inside, AJ found his clothes from that night as well as a change of clothes. Most likely Howie’s doing. He would think of bringing AJ fresh clothes for when he went home. Ignoring the aches in his body, AJ took off his gown and dressed himself. If they thought he was going to stay here, they had another thing coming.
When he was finally dressed, he moved back into the room. To his surprise, he found Kevin standing by his bed. AJ saw the look on his face and didn’t even hesitate. He stepped sideways to the tray near him and grabbed the scalpel that was sitting there. He held it in one hand, his eyes hard, his body taunt, daring Kevin to step toward him. “I’m not staying here.”
“You need to be in that bed, Age.” Kevin said gently. “I had a feeling you’d try to leave. It’s why I came back.”
“I’m not getting in that fucking bed while Brian’s out there. Now get the hell out of my way.”
“No.”
AJ snarled and took a step forward. He must have looked as hard and furious as he felt because Kevin took a step back. “Get on the other side of the bed, Kev. I will not hesitate to use this if you don’t get the fuck out of my way.”
He saw as Kevin realized that AJ meant what he said. Hands in the air, he slowly backed up, moving to the side of the bed furthest from the door. AJ nodded at him. “Now toss me your keys.”
With one hand, Kevin grabbed his keys and tossed them without even hesitating. “AJ, you really shouldn’t do this.” He tried again. “You could hurt yourself more and that wouldn’t be helping Brian at all.”
“Yeah, because you’re so keen on ‘helping’ Brian, right?” AJ snapped. He tossed the scalpel to the side and darted out the door before Kevin could say a word. Even though his body trembled, his legs were fast as he found the staircase and made his way to the ground floor. Nothing and no one was going to stand between him and Brian. In his mind, he heard Brian’s words again, the last thing he’d said before leaving with Zach. . “Be strong, Alex. Help is coming. Be strong, please. I love you. More than anything, I love you.”
AJ sent up a silent prayer. Now it’s your turn. You be strong, Bri. Please. I’m coming. I love you. More than anything, I love you too.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Fate hadn’t been kind lately with Brian and he should already know that his wish to never wake up again wouldn’t be granted. The place where he had been, before waking up, wasn’t a particular one like a beach or infinite grass or whatever someone read in books or sees in movies. There was only blackness, no silence if not for his own breathing and everything didn’t weight: his body seemed boneless, his mind was in a midway place where no harm was taken in consideration. More honestly, he wasn’t even thinking... he didn’t even know what he was doing, maybe it was just a safe place to hide before he was forced to get back to reality. Get back to the pain and get back to Zach.
Because, when it happened, Brian believed that he had been sent to hell without the dying part in between. Pain had risen up to a level that wasn’t that bad but it was everywhere, like someone had used him as a punching bag, forgetting that there was more bones than skin to protect. His head, though, was the worst: it burned, it throbbed and it felt like some marching bands had taken their place and was doing the noisiest songs in the entire world.
A voice started to make its way through the constant pounding, a whisper that contrasted with the raw anger showed into those words. It made him cringed although his pained hazed brain couldn’t grasp what they meant. It was still all confused around him, still he didn’t seem to remember what happened to him though a place in his mind knew but didn’t want to pass along the information about memories there were quite horrible as his first meeting with that blonde guy that now was still speaking, louder and louder until Brian was sure that someone could hear him if he was outside that house. But, now and then, through darkness that was slowly dissolving, flashes kept hit him, an overflow of sensations that made his aches hurting more, if that was possible: the feeling of knuckles slamming into his skin, knees pressing down onto his kneecaps, making impossible for him to move or to try to escape, teeth that sank deep, forming a permanent reminder that someone had tried to mark him as his own.
I’ve to punish you, my angel. You’ve tried to run away, you’ve tried to go back to that rebel! What I have to do to make you see that I’m your only one? I’ve to show you this, I’ve to show how wrong is to feel something for that guy.
More alert, despite that meant that even the pounding in his head became more active, Brian tried to block out those words, focusing all left energies into what he needed to do to just be away from that man. Screw about trying to act so he could have a little freedom, screw trying to be the good one that didn’t think about his own safety. Perhaps it was only because of the pain, perhaps it was because he had tried to save Alex and didn’t work out... or, simply and plain, he was beyond being scared if he had to stay another day with Zach. He was wrong about the hurting part, a psycho like him couldn’t discern the difference between good and bad... hell, that guy saw the ghost of the guys he had murdered, how he was supposed to stay calm and not be afraid to be hurt again?
I’ll make you see how someone is supposed to love you.
Then hands. Hands up and down his body, caressing and just touching. The bruised parts of his skin screamed in agony but his mind’s screams were much louder because it recognized the true meaning behind those acts. The realization didn’t take too much to present itself: history was going to repeat itself and, if he didn’t do anything to stop this, it would never end. That thought was enough to snap Brian from that place framed between consciousness and darkness; colors and shapes swam into each other but all Brian could focus was on that blonde hair and blue eyes that seemed to have doubled. It didn’t matter, he started to struggle, trying to liberate his hands from the tight grasp of Zach’s ones.
“Oh no, I can’t have you doing this. You aren’t going to run away from me.”
Before Brian couldn’t even try to protest or try to, a metal click resounded in the room, along with the cold feeling of something around his wrists. Chained. He chained him to the bed. How was he now supposed to fight against? He was about to plea, to beg and ask forgiveness... anything to just let him go when Aj’s words flooded trough him: back to a hotel room where he had been hiding from everyone but him, after showing him what Zach had done to him. How Alex believed that he had fought. I don’t see you being the type to just stand there and let it happen. You’re stronger than that.” It prided him, giving him energies and forces he had never thought he could have. He wouldn’t beg, instead he would fight for his freedom even if it meant doing things that sickened him to the very core. Willing down any pains and fears, he looked with a steady gaze into Zach’s eyes.
“I’m not going anywhere. – He pronounced firmly. – There’s no use for the handcuffs.”
The hands stopped for a second, a grin morphed Zach’s smile into something that made him shiver in fear but the other guy didn’t say anything. His hands went back to their tasks, slowly coming inch and inch closer to his crotch but stopped before reaching it. Lips travelled up, covering every part of his skin that only now he realized was uncovered. Once they reached his jaw, Brian didn’t turned it away, although the desire was so strong that it physically hurt; he didn’t even flinch as they started to leave butterfly touches all over his jaw line, avoiding his lips.
“My love, you know that I can’t do it. - Zach whispered in his right ear, before nibbling it. – Do you remember that night? We were so perfect for each other, you were so heavenly! The way your body reacted to my touches, the way you screamed for me... I want it all again. I need to feel you again.” As he spoke, his hands started stroking him in the same forceful way they did that night. All came back once again inside Brian’s mind, it was like nothing had changed: his body reacting, his shame growing and growing until it was all he could think of. He was letting him do whatever he wanted, he wasn’t fighting back like he should. Oh Alex, you were wrong. I’m not strong. It was a downhill spinning, everything was slipping and he didn’t know how to stop. There was no escape, no matter how he responded or how much he yelled that he didn’t want this, Zach was so engrossed in himself that every no was like a yes to him. But he couldn’t let him win like that, he couldn’t let him destroy what little hope he had for a future with Alex. He shut himself down, alienating from that reality and trying to find a way to make Zach releasing him before he could do any other harm.
Think, Brian, think. The hands were gone, a wet sensation told him what was happening but he refused to give it attention, although he couldn’t help his body’s reaction to try to escape from it, without a care if it was going to hurt itself. Don’t focus on what he’s doing, think of Alex. If anything, do it for him. “Zach, please... let me free... I... I want to touch you.”
His words, that admission about a desire to reciprocate the same feelings, did its work on Zach: everything stopped, no more touching or licking or groping or whatever. Zach raised his head, his mouth still open and looked at him completely in shock. “What did you say?”
Brian didn’t lower his gaze. “Free me, please. I wanna be able to touch you.”
Zach didn’t reply. He just leaned over and kissed him, this time Brian didn’t object or try to put up a resistance. Instead, he merged all of his confusion, anger and repulsion into something that could resemble lust, something that could assure Zach that he was being honest and really wanting to touch him. Before they could part, a small click told him that he was free. Battling the urge to just run, he knew that he had to play well his cards or he would end up like that once again. He had to be sure that Zach wouldn’t be able to catch him when he would run away and there was only a way. He brought his hands on Zach’s back, stroking and caressing it as he tried his best to not see the pleasure showing its light inside those eyes.
With an instinctive twist, he moved the two of them, pinning Zach on the mattress, bringing his hands over the head. He kept kissing him, remembering what Nick had shown him once, something about mixing the pain with the pleasure. He could feel Zach’s arousal beneath him, which led him to think about his last night with Alex, how he had been scared about feeling his own, even if it was covered by layer. Now, instead, there weren’t clothes between them and sensing it was just close to send him on a panic overdrive but he managed to get it down. It wasn’t the time for that, he couldn’t waste or lose any second. Before the other could do something, he took the cuffs and chained them around his wrists, the click of the metal sounded so appealing as he waited for Zach to react.
“What? What did you do?” He asked, looking at him with surprise.
Tracing a finger on his cheek, Brian just smiled. “I want to play dirty too. Don’t you like it?”
The pleasure had Zach shivering. “I love everything that you wanna do, my love.”
“That’s good.” Brian replied with a mischievous grin. Then, he jumped down from the bed, gathering his clothes. He didn’t even look if those were his or Zach’s, he just grabbed the first shorts and shirt that he found, quickly putting them on.
“Brian? What are you doing? - Zach asked with an heartbreaking tone in his voice and trying to not listen to the others voices, the ones that were making fun of him and stating that Brian was going to abandon him. He wouldn’t do that, not after the way he had kissed him! – You can’t leave me! You love me!”
Brian turned around, eyeing the man he had been scared of for so long time. Now, he couldn’t hurt him anymore or couldn’t force him to stay there and take another torture. But, if anyone would have asked, he didn’t know where it started or what would have taken place only a moment after. One minute, he was ready to run without even looking back for a moment, just wanting to forget that he had been here for days and days and try to find his way back home; a minute after, he was still standing near the bed, looking down to the man chained at it as all of his hurt and pain merged together in a feeling he had fought with for God only knew how long. Anger.
It wasn’t the simple angry emotion as a result of everything that had taken place in days and days of torture and suffering. No, it was pure and raw rage, that kind of feeling that could blind you, a fire that had started so slowly but now was burning with high flames and consumed every obstacle that stood between it and its freedom. For the very first time in his life, Brian wanted to hurt Zach like he had done to him or as much as he had hurt Alex or Nick; he wanted to hurt him and made him bleed like those guys he killed might had.
In that moment, he felt like he could do the same exact thing and it would be so easy: all he had to do was to trick Zach and then struggle him. It was so simple, so tempting and yet a tiny but strong voice in his mind stopped him. Killing him wouldn’t make him better than Zach himself, on the contrary, it would make him nothing more than him. Even if it was a fair revenge for all he had been through or what everyone around him had to go through because of him... even if he had all the good reasons he knew that it was only a flickering revenge, a satisfaction that it would only turn into guilty, something he didn’t need on top of everything.
However, that didn’t mean that he wasn’t going to make him pay for what he had done, only that he wasn’t going to punch him or do any damage physically. But, sometimes, words could hurt worse than hundred stabs, especially if they were directed to that weak spot that could destroy someone. And Brian knew where to attack and, oh, he wasn’t afraid of doing it.
“You love me, I know you do! – Zach was still screaming, moving all around trying to snap free from the cuffs. – It’s all that bastard’s fault! He brainwashed you! We belong together, I know and I know that you love me!”
Brian didn’t wait anymore. There, the air filling with his wheezing breathing, he didn’t know how he managed to keep a firm and somehow cold voice. “Love you? Love you? Do you honestly believe that I can love someone like you? Someone that had killed innocent guys for his own pleasure, someone that had tried and hurt the ones that I love the most! I won’t ever love you! – He inched closer, so close that eyes were just touching and lips were that close that, in another moment, it would scared him to the very end. Not now, not where Brian felt like there was someone else playing his part, moving his body and speaking the words he wanted to say every day from that night. – You disgust me.”
What happened next, Brian couldn’t expect or prevent it. Focused totally on those twisted eyes, he couldn’t help the satisfaction that started to arise in him as he saw see the hurt and the heartache appearing in those cold eyes while he understood what he was saying. It was overwhelming not being a victim anymore, it made him feel like he had finally inflicted the same amount of pain he had to go through and, in the logical side of his mind, it scared him. It scared him the way he was enjoying the pain in those eyes, he was enjoying being the one to finally have the control in his hands.
Then, it happened. In an instant, the hurt from Zach’s eyes was gone, replaced with that red madness that had always been present from the start. Then, Brian found himself flying backwards, a stabbing pain in his stomach as Zach’s feet kicked him with an amount of force that Brian didn’t knew it was humanly possible to have.
Something cracked, he felt it as soon as he landed on the floor. Something in his stomach cracked or broke but he didn’t let the pain stop him. He ran. Ran away from that room, ran away from those screams that haunted for a revenge
You’re gonna pay! You’re gonna pay for this! If I can’t have you, then nobody gets to!
But Brian kept running. Soon, he had done the stairs; soon, he was out from the door. He didn’t’ even felt the rain starting hitting his skin, barely covered to defend itself from the freeze and cold of the air. No, the cold helped his body to numb itself more, silencing every aching or pain. More important, the cold numbed his mind, leaving out the only thought that could push him out of the woods. Alex, I’m coming.
So he ran.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The further AJ drove, the more his anger grew. He could feel it building in him, threatening to take him under, threatening to break him apart. Right underneath it ran fear. Would he get to Brian in time? All those times he’d promised to keep Brian safe; to take care of him! Now look where he was. Off somewhere in the hands of the person who he was the most terrified of, all to protect those that he loved.
“Damn you, Brian.” AJ cursed, wiping a hand over his cheek. He took the next corner a little sharper than he intended, not used to driving Kevin’s truck, but he didn’t care. “Damn you. Why’d you have to do this? Why’d you have to be so fucking self-sacrificing?”
He knew why. That was just who Brian was. And, in his shoes, AJ knew he would have probably done the same thing. Anything, to keep loved ones safe. If he had to choose between Brian being in danger, or going and being tortured to keep Brian safe, he knew he’d choose the torture every single time.
Another turn came up on the empty road. AJ almost took it, driving instinctively to the Littrell’s house. At the last minute he stopped himself, jerking the car straight, thanking God that there was no one else on the road. He might have caused an accident otherwise.
No, he couldn’t pull up over there. If he did, everyone would probably gain up on him and force him back to the hospital. Absently he scratched at his neck. He didn’t want to go back to the hospital. He wanted to find Brian; needed to find him. To do that, he had to stay out of the way of the others.
AJ pulled up one street over, parking in someone’s empty driveway. When they came home they’d wonder who the hell was parked there but he didn’t care. From there he snuck into their back yard, climbing over the fence and dropping down to the ground on the other side. Thankfully, no one saw him, no one came after him.
Now AJ was free to come at the very woods he’d been in the last time he’d been awake. From here he was coming in at a different angle, so it took him a moment to find his way to where he and Brian had been. But soon enough he found the little house that he’d seen in the distance that night, dark and abandoned. It was empty; but he’d expected that. He wandered around outside, looking at the ground, trying to force his brain to think.
Where would they have gone? Brian had made a point of saying that they’d stay in Lexington, right? He’d stressed that when he’d been talking to Zach overtop of AJ. So that meant that they were somewhere in this town. He’d also mentioned being nearby so that he could be close to his parents. So, they couldn’t be too far.
Following a hunch, AJ snagged his phone, pulling it from his pocket and turning it on. He waited through the power up impatiently. Once it was ready, he ignored the stack of messages it said he had, as well as missed calls, and he dialed 411. After a moment, he spoke with a woman and was soon connected with a real estate office in Lexington. A perky sounding woman answered the phone. Good. Women were easier to charm then men.
“Well hello darling.” AJ let his voice fill with a good humor he didn’t feel. Act, he told himself. Play the part. “I sure hope you can help me today. See, my partner and I are looking to buy a home in the area and finally move in together.”
“Oh, congratulations!” She gushed happily. Oh yeah, this was going to be easy.
“Thank you. I’m really excited by this. But, see, here’s the thing.” AJ pretended to sound a little frustrated and a little amused at the same time. All the while, his eyes scanned the woods, looking for clues. “My partner, he told me he had a house he was thinking of buying and he wanted me to check it out. So I flew up here to check it out, but he had to go on a meeting and he left. I got to my parent’s house and all I had was a note telling me to contact the realtor and I could see the place. But he never said what realtor!”
The two laughed together. “Well that’s simple enough. I can look up his name in the system if you’d like me to.” She offered.
“Would you? Oh, that’d be great!” AJ’s cheerful voice was at total odds with the murderous look on his face. He moved away from the back of the house, trying to check the ground, to see if there was a trail of footprints anywhere. He had to resist sighing in disgust when he saw the tons of footprints. The search party had ruined any chance of a trail.
“Ok, hon, what’s his name?”
“Well, if he was looking up stuff under just his name it’d be listed for Zach. If it’s under his and mine, it’d be Zach and Brian.” The lie rolled easily off his tongue. Anything, he’d do anything it would take to get Brian back. Please, God, let his hunch be right. It would pay off so well!
The woman laughed softly in his ear and AJ felt his heart start to pound loudly with the hope that was building. “Oh my God, I don’t even need to look it up. Of course I remember him! Zach Williams. What a sweet, sweet man! So you’re his Brian, hm? Gosh, he talked so much about you I feel like I already know you!”
AJ gritted his teeth. “That’s him. He’s just a sweetie like that.” God, that was hard to force out. “So, does that mean you know where I should go to view the house?” Please, please, let this work! Let his luck hold strong!
“It’s too bad he had to leave. He said he wanted to surprise you with this. But, since he told you to get ahold of us, I suppose that means its ok for me to tell you this. Just don’t tell anyone, ok? I’d get in trouble people found out I gave this out without verifying who you are.”
“My lips are sealed, darling.”
“He didn’t just find a house to view. He went ahead and bought the house.” As she rattled off an address, AJ was already moving off into the woods. He knew exactly where she was talking about. It was a beautiful, older style house, about a fifteen to twenty minute walk through the woods. He knew he could make it faster.
He didn’t waste time saying anything to the lady at the real estate office. She’d already given him all the information he needed. Without hesitating, he ended the call and shoved the phone in his pocket even as he was running. Every part of his body ached and throbbed and screamed at him, protesting as he ran around trees, jumped over logs, and ducked under branches. He didn’t care. Brian, Brian, Brian.
In the middle of the woods was a creek. At one point in time, there’d been a log across it that he and Brian had used to walk over it in the few times they’d walked here. All of the guys had spent time in the Littrell house before, visiting with Brian and enjoying a break. They’d all learned the woods behind the house fairly well.
When AJ reached the creek, he started cursing steadily when he saw the log wasn’t there. The creek wasn’t too wide, AJ thought to himself. He made the split second decision, never having stopped his running, and there was no time to change his mind. He hit the bank and pushed off as best he could. He almost made it across. Almost.
But his body wasn’t at its usual strength. He made it about three quarters of the way before he hit the water. Luckily he was in the shallower part; he only sunk to his knees. But the splash from his impact was enough to drench him almost completely. He didn’t care. As soon as he could move, he was wading out the river, dripping as he came up on the other bank. Then he was running again. What he’d do when he got there, he had no idea, but dammit, he would not leave Brian alone any longer than he had to.
By the time he reached the backyard of the house, he was panting from the strength it took him to run. He was frantic in his need to get to Brian. But, he was practical too. If he charged in there, he could get Brian killed. He needed to move slowly, carefully.
As quietly as possible, he made his way up the back porch, keeping out of view of the open patio door. He crept up to it, keeping his ears alert. There were no sounds from inside the house. AJ snuck a glance in, saw the dining room was empty and chanced slipping inside. A peek in the kitchen showed that it was empty too.
A soft thump came from upstairs. AJ tipped his head up, glaring hard at the ceiling. So they were upstairs. Images of what could be happening up there spun around inside of AJ’s mind, building his rage back up, making his stomach churn. He had to force himself not to go rushing up there, find the room they were in, snatch Zach away and killing the man with his bare hands. Brian wouldn’t like that. He wouldn’t want AJ to go to jail. More importantly, Brian might end up hurt somehow.
This had to be done carefully. If he could avoid trouble, he would.
A sudden sound alerted AJ that someone was running down the stairs. He heard cursing, followed by a crash. Then the sound of footsteps in the hall, on the stairs. Shit! That had to be Zach coming down. As much as AJ wanted a confrontation between him and Zach, he knew that it wasn’t smart. For all he knew, Zach could have a gun. So he did the practical thing and ducked inside the broom closet at the edge of the kitchen.
There he stood, holding his breath as he listened to footsteps beat across the floor, racing through the house and out the back door. God, Brian must have pissed him off. What had he done to Brian? Was he ok? Had he…had he killed him?
That thought ate at AJ’s insides. He couldn’t stay in here anymore. If Zach had gone out the back door, now was the time for AJ to sneak upstairs. He’d set Brian free and together they’d find their way out. As silently as he could, AJ stepped out of the closet. Silently he moved through the kitchen, pausing only for a moment to grab a knife from the butcher block. Best to be armed he thought.
Then, up the stairs, down the hallway, all the while the knife was gripped in his hand in case Zach decided to come back.
There was the sound of a voice, down at the end of the hall. It was soft, barely audible. The closer AJ got, the more he could hear it, though he couldn’t understand it. Wait a second…the voice sounded all wrong. That didn’t sound like Brian. Had he got the wrong house somehow? Was there a chance he was in the wrong place? Or had Zach taken someone else as well?
Nausea boiled in AJ’s stomach as he stepped up to the door and pushed it open with the knife. He never expected to find what he did. There was Zach, lying naked in the center of a bed, his hands chained to the bedpost. For a moment, all AJ could do was stand there and stare and wonder, Where the hell was Brian?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Of course, he would lose himself in the woods!
When Brian first started to run away from the house, he didn’t even look at where he was going. The main thing was only to get away from that place and put a safe distance between him and Zach, though it would take a miracle for him to succeed into releasing himself. It didn’t matter anyway, he wouldn’t stand still and wait to see what could happen.
But, as the trees became more and more thick, he realized that he was running in the opposite direction where his home should be. Maybe the house where Zach had held him captive was really that far from the beginning of the woods and he couldn’t even remember from which direction they came from, but if he was going in the right direction, the trees would be less and less until the woods were replaced by grass. But back then... gosh! Too lost and too numb thinking over Alex had him losing any concept of space or time, neither paying attention to his surroundings. And now... now he was screwed. Totally screwed.
A dizzy spell made him lose his balance and before he could prevent it, he found himself flat on the ground, a sharp and burning pain from his ankle mixed itself with the others. Or, better say, made them awakening or maybe he had been to focus on running that he didn’t even notice any aches. Though, some of them couldn’t be silenced that simply! He rolled over onto his back, not caring about the raindrops that hit his face, washing away the dried tears. Had he been crying? He couldn’t remember, maybe he did... for what, the reasons could be so many that just beginning to think about them made him wanting to just lie there and wait, maybe hopelessly, for someone to save him.
Having been always someone’s else hero, having always been the one that had to strengthen up and save his friends, now he just couldn’t do anymore. He was hurt, he was freaking dead tired but, most of everything, he was ashamed and disgusted about the things he had to do in order to escape. This wasn’t like when he had been raped, this time he had consciously thought about it and tried to pleasure Zach. How could Alex be able to want him or love him knowing what he did? And without Alex, without him by his side, what was the point into going on? God, giving up never sounded so tempting, he could already feel his aching throbbing less and less as he started to submit himself into the black ocean sweeping around him.
Brian Thomas Littrell, don’t you fucking dare to give up!
Strange, Brian thought, how come he was able to hear Alex’s voice? He opened his eyes, blinking them rapidly to try to adjust his visions but the double images didn’t disappear. And he wasn’t giving up, he was just getting to sleep a little.
You can well sleep when you get back. If you go to sleep now, you’re not going to wake up.
A part of him, the one that was still fighting and clearly analyzing the situation, understood what the Aj’s voice conscience was pointing out: headache, dizziness and troubled vision meant only one thing and that was that he had probably a concussion. Which meant that falling asleep in the middle of nowhere wasn’t the smartest thing to do if he wanted to stay alive. And he wanted to be only... only that he was tired! Would it be wrong if he would just sleep a little? Then he would go back walking, trying to find his way home. Only few minutes...
And then minutes will be hours and hours days... don’t fall asleep, Brian, or you’re going to let him win. You’ve come this far, you freed yourself from him. It’s just a little thing, the last thing and then it would be really over.
Him? Zach? Of course... Zach would be able to free himself, find him there and then the nightmare he had been able to escape from would start all over again. God, no! he couldn’t let it happen! His conscience, his Aj’s conscience, was right: what was the point in escaping if he would give up when he was so close to finally be free? Now it was the time to finally use that strength that Alex had always told him about, that forces that he never believed he had.
First, he needed to check his own injuries: aside from the probable concussion – and he didn’t dare to think of something worse but the truth was that he was scared it might be – the rest of the aches were only due to the bruises all over his body, cuts from the handcuffs when he had tried to free himself and probably scratches from his fall. Passing a hand over his stomach cleared that he might had cracked a rib and the throbbing in his lower parts spoke of a twisted ankle. Oh well, he was used to that: jumping from stages, falling from stairs because he was that clumsy... Kevin always joked that it was a miracle that he still hadn’t broken it!
His mind set on the task, Brian slowly got up, standing still as he waited for the waves of dizziness spinning around him. Breathe in and then out, breathe in and then out, he repeated that mantra until he was sure that the nausea was under control. Then, he started walking: running was out of question, not only because of his injuries but he would be soon out of energies and he couldn’t afford that. Jogging and walking would take much longer time but it would get him far, maybe closer so he could be seen.
So, he walked towards the direction he had come from. Rain still poured down, flashes of lights now and then foreshadowed a storm and a cold wind battled against his naked skin. Still, he walked, singing to himself every song he knew, from the ones he was used to sing in church to Backstreet’s songs. Anything to keep himself awake.
Time lost its meaning. Well, it had lost it since the last time he had seen Alex, for he couldn’t remember if it had been only yesterday or two days before or even a week before. And now... now the seconds and the minutes stretched as they were hours, long spaces of time that didn’t help him to see if it was night or day or how long he had been walking since the last stop. He was lost, that for sure, because he couldn’t even see Zach’s house. What if he had taken the wrong direction again?
No, don’t think like that. Just keep walking and you will be out of the woods. He repeated like a mantra as he fought the growing desire to rest a little. Because he knew, he knew that if he rest now, he wouldn’t be able to keep going on. So, he regained singing some songs Nick had made him listened with his random cds he always brought wherever they went and kept walking. But when he ran out of songs, he didn’t’ stop but started rambling about all he could come up with: things he wanted to do as soon as he got home, places he wanted to visit as a normal guy, maybe with Alex with him. Gosh, there was so much he had to do before even thinking about travelling the world again.
His pace got slower, moving his legs seemed like dragging them through mud or quicksand. Although he forced them, forced himself to keep walking, he knew that he had to stop. The headache that had accompanied him during his walk didn’t slow down as he did; instead, it had turned into something worse, an ache spreading from his right temple through the back of his skull and then down onto the shoulder, making Zach’s bite throbbing even more than before. He had to stop, so he just leaned over a tree, sliding down until he was sitting, didn’t caring if he was on a puddle.
Just as he curled himself as tight as possible, barely caring if his rib screamed at the gesture, a loud bolt of lightning split the sky and made him shivered even more. Damn, wasn’t him lucky? Lost in the woods, hurt, tired and now there was a storm! No one knew, no one but Nick knew that he was absolutely terrified about storms: it wasn’t the lightning or the strong wind that scared him. No, it was the thunders, those loud rumbles that shook him every time.
It was silly, he knew, because he was now twenty – seven years old and he couldn’t still be afraid, ‘cause he knew that there wasn’t nothing to be afraid of. But the memories connected to that natural force that made him jumpier and scared as a kitten. Back when he was in the hospital, one night there had been an awful thunderstorm: he had been asleep and he was all alone because, now that he wasn’t that sick, his parents had been sent home to rest. He didn’t recall why none of the nurses had come to check on him but the power went out and all he had been able to think had been to hide in the tiny bathroom.
And now... now he felt like that little boy. All alone with thunders chasing each other and dueling for being the loudest one. Maybe... maybe he could close his eyes for a moment. All around him was spinning, clones of trees and bushes danced at the rhythm of the rain. He would just rest a little and then he would get up and walk again.
Just a minute. He repeated as he rested his forehead on his knees, tightening himself more as shivers got more rough. Just a minute. Blackness pulled him under, welcoming him into its arms and with promises of sweet dreams. Just a minute.
Just a minute.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“Where’s Brian?” They were the only two words that AJ could make himself say. He stood in the door, knife in hand, staring at the man who was the center of his hatred. The center of the pain in his and Brian’s life.
Zach tossed his head back and forth, his eyes wide and unseeing. “Gone, gone, gone!” He sobbed out. Then the sadness turned to rage. “That bastard! I’ll fucking kill him!” Back to pain again, tears in his voice. “Oh, why’d he go? Why’d he leave me?”
It didn’t take much for AJ’s mind to make the leap. Brian had been the one he’d heard racing out of the house. Brian was out there, right now, wandering the woods, trying to find his way home. AJ knew he should turn and leave right then. He needed to find Brian. That was the single most important thing. But somehow he found himself moving forward. His feet carried him toward the bed. Then he was standing over Zach, staring down at him.
He saw the exact moment that Zach realized who was there. His eyes went wide and his face twisted in a rictus of grief and rage. “You!” He spat out. His whole body jerked as he tried to move his hands, the cuffs stopping them. When that didn’t work, he made to kick his feet out.
AJ’s rage boiled up, gripping him tightly. He didn’t stop to even think. One minute he was standing beside the bed, Zach’s feet flying toward him; the next he was on the bed, knees on either side of Zach’s chest, one hand fisted in his hair, the knife held to his throat.
Neither man moved. AJ panted with the force of his anger as he stared down at the man below him. His body vibrated with both his anger and with the trembles that came from his detoxing. “I ought to kill you right fucking now.” He hissed at Zach. “Slit your fucking throat and leave you here to bleed. I ought to torture you; make you hurt for every fucking moment you hurt him.”
“I never hurt him.” Zach said with a insane little giggle. “We love each other.”
The knife pressed into Zach’s skin, making a small red line of blood well up against his neck. AJ had just barely broken through the skin. “Don’t you talk about him like that. You don’t love him and he doesn’t love you. You’re a twisted little fucking bastard.” AJ leaned down, glaring at Zach. Oh, how he wanted to jerk that knife, to let it slice his throat open. But in the back of his mind he could hear Brian as clear as if he was standing right there. No he said to him. No, Alex. He’s not worth it. I don’t need you in jail. I need you here, with me.
AJ took a deep breath, forcing down as much of his rage as he could. “I won’t kill you.” He told him. “Your ass is going to rot in fucking jail, knowing the whole time that Brian’s out there, without you, happy.” His face turned ever harder. “But I swear to God, you will never touch him again.” he told Zach. “Or I will find you and I’ll finish this. My way.”
“You don’t scare me, you little punk!” Zach spat out. He pushed his throat against the knife. “Go ahead, kill me. You think you can? Think you’d like watching my blood pour out all over the place? You don’t have the balls to fucking do it!”
The knife trembled slightly in AJ’s hand. He sat up, pulling his hand away from Zach’s throat before he gave in to temptation. He saw Zach’s smirk and couldn’t resist responding to it. He shifted off Zach’s chest and brought his knife hand down, sliding the knife underneath Zach’s cock, pressing the sharp blade against the base. Satisfaction blazed in him when he saw Zach freeze and his eyes go wide. “You think I don’t have the balls to kill you?” AJ whispered to him. “Test that theory and you won’t have any balls at all. I’ll cut them off. I’ll cut everything off. We’ll see how well you can rape people once you’re a eunuch.”
AJ pulled the knife away and climbed from the bed. Behind him, he heard Zach roar with anger, vile things spewing from his mouth. Don’t listen he told himself. Outside, he heard a bang of thunder. A moment later there was the sound of rain hitting the roof, quickly moving from a drizzle to a downpour. Brian was out there in that. The poor man was probably terrified. He thought no one knew his fear of thunderstorms, but AJ knew, he’d seen it on the nights they’d shared a hotel room. He’d seen the way Brian’s body would tremble in his bed with each boom of the thunder and he’d ached each time to go hold him but he’d known he couldn’t.
Just as he was moving to leave, AJ heard Zach shout something that made his blood run cold. “I hope he fucking dies out there! I hope I hit him hard enough that he’ll never make it home. Not with the damage I did to his fucking head!”
Rage was a living thing. It didn’t just fill him, it roared its way up and exploded out of him. Before AJ even knew what he was doing, he spun around and drove the knife in his hand straight down into Zach’s thigh, all the way through and into the mattress.
Without another word, he turned and raced out of the house, the sound of Zach’s screams like music in his ears.
All that was important now was finding Brian. That was all that mattered. AJ didn’t know where to start, where to go, but he took off out the back door like a rocket, racing off toward the trees. The rain had erased most tracks, so he was running blindly, not sure where to go or what to do.
The rain was coming down harder and harder, the clouds making the sky grow even darker. Night was rolling in even the blackness of the clouds blotted out the last bit of sunshine. Branches whipped against AJ’s skin as he ran through the trees, not knowing where he was going; only knowing that he had to find Brian. He had to! He called his name into the air, praying that Brian would hear him over the thunder, that he would find him somewhere.
Fear dragged at him, wanting to pull him down, to yank him under. No! He wouldn’t give up!
Suddenly, in a flash of lightning, AJ saw something white in the distance. He moved toward it, praying like he’d never prayed before. Another flash of light and AJ felt his heart almost explode. There was Brian! Leaning against a tree, curled up in a little ball, Brian sat motionless in the rain.
AJ ran straight to him, dropping to the ground, sliding in the mud as he did. He didn’t care. He scrambled over the last few inches to where Brian was sitting, reaching for him as he sobbed his name over and over. “Brian, Brian! Baby, oh God, baby, it’s me!” AJ wasn’t even aware of the words as he said them. He cupped Brian’s face in his hands, that beautiful, precious face.
Tears mixed with the rain on AJ’s face. He felt nothing; no cold, no pain. Only love for the man in front of him. He’d found him! Frantically he dropped a hand to Brian’s neck, feeling for a pulse. When he found one, he sobbed out loud. “Brian, baby, come on. Wake up. It’s me. It’s AJ. Come on now.”
A small tremor ran through Brian. Though his eyes didn’t open, his mouth moved, forming one word in a soft whisper barely able to be heard through the storm. “Alex?”
“Oh, baby, it’s me. I’m right here. I’ve got you now. You’re safe.” AJ didn’t think, he simply gathered Brian to him, stroking his hands over him. Brian was alive!
“You found me.” Brian whispered. “You found me.”
“I did. I’m sorry I wasn’t faster, Bri. God, I’m so sorry.”
Brian’s head tipped up, his face nuzzling against AJ’s. “You found me.” He whispered again. Then his lips were rubbing over AJ’s, pressing in for a kiss that had AJ crying even more at the pure sweetness of it. When they broke apart, AJ looked into the face of the one he loved more than life itself and his body gave a tremble.
Reality came crashing back in when AJ saw the blood mixing with the rain on Brian’s face. Zach’s words about head injuries drifted back to him. He saw Brian’s eyes flutter, fighting to open, and a new fear gripped at AJ’s heart.
“Bri, baby, come on. I need you to wake up for me.” AJ said urgently. He slapped lightly at Brian’s cheek, trying to keep him alert. “You can’t go to sleep out here. You’ve got a head injury.”
“I know.” Brian whispered. “So tired.”
Determination stiffened AJ’s spine. He had to be strong right now. For Brian’s sake. He grabbed Brian’s hand, using it to pull Brian’s arm over his shoulders. “I know you’re tired, baby. You’ll rest soon, I promise. But we need to get you home. Come on now, on your feet.”
It took almost all of AJ’s strength to plant his feet and pull them both upright. Brian’s body kept trying to sink back to the ground. But somehow AJ managed to get them up. He kept hold of Brian’s hand, keeping his arm over his shoulders, and he wrapped his other arm around Brian’s waist. “That’s it, Bri, you’re doing good. Let’s get you home, baby. Come on, one foot in front of the other. Walk for me.”
Brian said nothing, but he started to shuffle his feet. Dead ahead was the creek; AJ could hear it. So he steered them right. The street should be over there. From there, they could walk the road down to the house. They could do it. He’d carry him if he had to.
It was the longest walk of AJ’s life. He kept up a reassuring litany, trying to keep Brian motivated. Twice Brian started to fall and AJ had to hold on tight, forcing him to stay on his feet, all the while pleading with him to keep moving. His own body was aching from the times he’d fallen, from the injuries he’d got when Zach had attacked him, from his dip in the creek. None of it mattered.
Lights appeared ahead. “Bri, honey, we’re almost to the road. Just a little further. We’re almost there.”
The trees broke around them, revealing the sidewalk ahead. AJ thanked God as they stepped onto the pavement. That was when he realized, as he felt the cold, wet cement, that he had lost his shoes somewhere along the way. It didn’t matter. He ignored the pain in the bottom of his feet. One foot in front of the other.
There were lights ahead, down by the Littrell house. AJ focused on them as he kept him and Brian moving. Still speaking words of encouragement, AJ took step after step, not noticing the time or the distance, only focusing on his goal. Brian was getting heavier and heavier, obviously trying to go back to sleep.
A sudden shout rent the air, breaking into AJ’s concentration. He pushed it aside. “Almost there.” Voices, louder now. “Just a little further, baby.”
Someone was shouting again, closer this time. He heard a voice scream “Call an ambulance!”
Then suddenly hands were on them, touching them both. AJ reacted instinctively, pulling Brian to him and trying to wrap him as close as possible. But still the hands were there, separating them, breaking them apart. “No!” AJ shrieked. He shoved at the hands, trying to force them away. “No!”
A pair of arms wrapped around him just as someone took Brian from his grasp. AJ would have screamed, would have fought with all his might, but the voice in his ear suddenly became clear. “You’re safe, Alexander. You’re safe.”
He recognized that voice. As AJ realized who it was, his body sagged. They’d made it. They’d made it back. “Brian…”
“He’s right there. He’s alive, because of you.” The voice whispered. AJ turned his head, looking into Micheal’s eyes. “You saved him, Alexander.”
“He saved himself.” AJ told him. Pride filled his heart. “He saved himself.”
Then, as terror and pain broke through his barriers, AJ collapsed into Micheal’s arms and sobbed like a child.